Nips & Bits

Jake [9:41 AM]:
dude. i'm sick. i hate when this happens. when i'm just feeling kinda bad and then i stay home... then a week later the stuff really hits and then i look like a slacker
Zhan [9:42 AM]:
Maybe you're a slacker
Jake [9:42 AM]:
i'm not tho. you are
Zhan [9:43 AM]:
Not really. I just look like one
Jake [9:44 AM]:
when you're laying on your stomach having a subordinate walk on your back, then fan you with palm leaves
Zhan [9:46 AM]:
Did you notice how much cleave she's sporting today?
Jake [9:46 AM]:
i'm telling you guys - those are good totz
Jake [9:47 AM]:
D didn't see it, but really, yes, there's support, but that's just bcz they bounce otherwise
Zhan [9:47 AM]:
I almost said something to her about her cleave, but figured i'd proally be crossing some line
Jake [9:47 AM]:
i think you shouldn't say anything. you'd make her feel weird
Zhan [9:48 AM]:
That's why I didn't.
Jake [9:48 AM]:
kind of like me walking around pretending that i don't know about the milk stain on my bewb
Zhan [9:48 AM]:
But I couldn't let your leaky teat go w/o a comment
Jake [9:48 AM]:
i know - that's why i came over. i knew you'd have something to say about it. but i was actually hoping to run into someone else in the hallway who would pretend not to notice it
Zhan [9:49 AM]:
hahahaha! Like heir director
Jake [9:49 AM]:
YEAH
Jake [9:49 AM]:
that would've been awesome
Zhan [9:49 AM]:
You should wear them bewbie pads
Jake [9:49 AM]:
i only need them every now and then, and they are terribly uncomfortable. they slide around. it's like putting maxipads in your shirt
Zhan [9:50 AM]:
I'd like to see one fall out as you're walking
Jake [9:50 AM]:
right
Jake [9:51 AM]:
tho some ladies could use them when wearing sweaters. that would probably be more appropriate than nippingout in the hallway like that one chick yesterday
Zhan [9:51 AM]:
I appreciate a good, firm set of nips
Jake [9:51 AM]:
who doesn't, but in the workplace? come on. that's inappropriate
Zhan [9:52 AM]:
What's a girl to do?
Jake [9:52 AM]:
she should wear pads
Zhan [9:52 AM]:
I'm so bummed I didn't notice!
Jake [9:52 AM]:
so what if i leak. that's natural. but nippingout in public. that's slotty.
Zhan [9:53 AM]:
Nipping should be confined to one's home or car.
Jake [9:53 AM]:
Precisely, esp if you unreasonably long ones
Zhan [9:54 AM]:
What's a reasonable length?
Jake [9:55 AM]:
1/3 inch
Zhan [9:55 AM]:
What were hers?
Jake [9:55 AM]:
long is 1/2 in … i don't know.
Zhan [9:55 AM]:
come on
Jake [9:55 AM]:
probably pushing 1/2
Zhan [9:55 AM]:
no way
Jake [9:55 AM]:
but i don't know what kind of undersuppport she had. that affects my estimate. i mean, if she was wearing padded, we could be talking a 3/4 in or more
Zhan [9:56 AM]:
That's what I'm talkin' bout
Jake [9:56 AM]:
but if just a standard 1-ply, then my 1st estimate holds
Zhan [9:57 AM]:
The hugest ones belong to Garr. Not just long, but thick in diameter
Jake [9:59 AM]:
how do you know? i envision a wild happy hour ... she seems like she could tie one on
Zhan [9:59 AM]:
Cuz she's always on high alert
Jake [10:00 AM]:
you can't determine diameter that way
Zhan [10:00 AM]:
can too; just of the eraser tip, not the whole pepperoni
Jake [10:01 AM]:
oh ok. i thot you were saying the whole thing
Zhan [10:02 AM]:
No, just the sundial. Although I bet she's got a healthy set of pancakes.
Jake [10:02 AM]:
that's tru. but you never know, but yeah, you're probably right about them
Zhan [10:03 AM]:
That'd be a good team-building exercise for the next big mtg. Every chick takes a rack pic -- just the rack, mind you, no face -- and they get pinned up on a board. Same w/guys and their scroats. The game is you try to ID people based on their respective bits.
Zhan [10:04 AM]:
I think I'd win.
Jake [10:04 AM]:
i think you might. what would the name of the game be...
Zhan [10:05 AM]:
Hmmm.
Jake [10:05 AM]:
Nipples & Bits
Zhan [10:05 AM]:
Good!
Jake [10:05 AM]:
and bits and bits
Zhan [10:05 AM]:
Nips & bits
Jake [10:06 AM]:
better
Zhan [10:07 AM]:
It'd be tough for the gurls. Scroatz would be hard to ID
Jake [10:08 AM]:
not w/the gem my pediatrician gave about brunettes having darker sacs
Zhan [10:09 AM]:
You'd better keep that hawt tip under wraps. That's your edge
Zhan [10:09 AM]:
You know, it's the same with nipz. blondes are way lighter. reds are way redder. Although sometimes reds have ones that look like they should be blondes. And then they're the whole issue that not a single chick here sports her natural hair color.
Jake [10:16 AM]:
that's true. tricky
Zhan [10:16 AM]:
But that's where the fun is